A Constant State of Prayer

"Without faith no one can please God. Anyone who comes to God must believe that he is real and that he rewards those who truly want to find him." Hebrews 11:6 (NCV)

"I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it." Mark 10:15 (NIV)

Before we left Washington I sensed that God was prepping me for what was to come. I remember praying about the decision that we had made to go to Romania as I drove to and from class (Olympia to Tacoma - Tacoma to Olympia). I recall hearing God instruct my spirit to; "Pray like you have never prayed before." I sensed in my heart that God's invitation to Romania was going to be an amazing challenge that could only be accepted standing side by side with Jesus. The invitation read:

"Come, and join me in my work in Romania. ( Join = to become linked or united.) My work is a work in progress. I am fully aware of all that has happened and all that will happen. I am simply asking you to link up with Me, the sovereign God, and follow my lead. I can tell you now that this assignment will require a deepening of your faith and a call to a constant state of prayer. Are you up for it? I am with you, don't be afraid. I will keep you, guide you, and provide all that you will need. Do you trust me? Will you follow me? Come…and join me."

The invitation has become my game plan. The challenge to deepen my faith and the call to a constant state of prayer has been put into practice from the moment I stepped off the plane. Eastern Europe is like nothing I have ever experienced before, yet I have peace and confirmation that God has called me here. The duties of our assignment…we would prefer to be different, but for the health and the future of the church, God has given us a strength that is not ours and a peace that moves us forward. He continues to provide for us, to calm us, and to constantly speak to us. Oh what a companion we have. The most faithful, perfect companion anyone could ever hope for. Oh how I love my Savior. Oh how I bask in the warmth of His presence. Read the following with your hearts open and your minds attentive to the instruction of your Savior:

"Just go step by step. My will shall be revealed as you go. You will never cease to be thankful for this time when you felt at peace and trustful, and yet had no human security. When human support or material help of any kind is removed, then My power can become operative. I cannot teach a man to walk who is trusting to a crutch. Away with your crutch, and My power shall so invigorate you that you shall indeed walk on to victory. Never limit My power. It is limitless." God Calling - February 4th devotion

Abba keep me from limiting the One who is limitless.

How is your heart beep?

The difficulties of life are caused by disharmony in the individual. - April 29th - God Calling AJ Russell

To conquer adverse circumstances, conquer yourselves. - May 2nd - God Calling AJ Russell

Disharmony - lack of agreement - in music or sounds, resulting in unpleasant sound combinations (Encarta).

Olivia leaned in and placed her plastic pink stethoscope on my chest and asked, "Is your heart beeping?" "I think so." I replied. "That's good." she responded.

The past few weeks we have experienced some disharmony, some adverse circumstances. I think the book God calling was written sometime in the 1930's, by two anonymous "listeners". This book has been my devotional source for the past year. Now, with that in mind, as we have experienced the circumstances that we have these past few weeks, I am in awe of how God provides answers for and clarity to my current situation by using something that was written 70 plus years ago. He has used this book to speak so profoundly to my heart that each day I am so very curious to find out what He has to say next. This past week, He did it again.

I have been praying and thinking a lot about what we are experiencing. I "process" things by dissecting what might be happening below the surface. On Tuesday April 29th I read, "The difficulties of life are caused by disharmony in the individual." (God Calling). I looked up the definition for disharmony and the following picture came to mind; Image yourself attending the premiere of a spectacular new musical in New York City. You splurge and you "do it up brown" (one of my father-in-law's famous quotes - it means "go all out"). You are to die for…looking fabulous. You nestle into your velvet red theatre seat that is ornately decorated when the lights begin to dim and you hear the tapping of the director's wand on the metal music stand…tap, tap, tap. You take a deep breath, close your eyes and prepare yourself for the music that is about to caress your senses. What happens next causes you to cover your ears in sheer agony. The sound that rings in your ears is so unpleasant that you run out of the auditorium simply to escape it.

One of the definition for disharmony is referring to music or sounds that result in an unpleasant sound combination. Now, when we think of disharmony in the sense of life's difficulties, do we first think about what sound combination might be happening in our own hearts that could be causing a lack of balance or conflict? Is it possible that the scene that I described above might just be the sound that flows from our hearts? I am not talking about who is to blame or who has instigated something, I am wanting us to think about what is happening within us. How is our heart beep? Is it healthy? Is it strong? Is it wounded? Has a bitter root begun to grow? What is going on in us? What kind of music flows from your heart? Is it a piece that brings comfort and joy to those around you or is it the result of an unpleasant sound combination? Believe it or not our hearts naturally produce some kind of music. And those whom we encounter day in and day out hear something. Life's difficulties can be conquered by an examination of what is happening within our hearts that is causing us to feel disharmony, conflict, or a lack of balance. How do we conquer these difficulties? By placing all situations, all circumstances in the faithful hands of God, our Heavenly Father. We struggle when we cannot make sense of things or when we can’t fix things for ourselves or others. Disharmony in our hearts occurs when we begin to doubt, fear, and question the sovereignty of God. Are you O.K. with that? Our doubts, anxieties, and fears create a mindset of uncertainty in God's power and His Amazing Grace. The antidote for a mindset of uncertainty is administered through the exercise of faith in God - Placing all of our eggs in God's basket that is limitless in power and overflows with His Amazing Grace. God is the Only One that we can bank on without fear of loss. May God give us the courage to examine the condition of our hearts.

When difficulties come, when adverse circumstances challenge you, STOP and examine your heart beep. What is causing the disharmony in your heart? What effects your heart will always effects your thought process and the condition of your spirit. How is your heart beep?

By His Stripes

I am in a state of numbness. My spirit is quiet, my body is still - I sit in silence. All that I hear is the ticking of the clock. It is 10:40 on a Saturday night - tomorrow is Easter Sunday (April 27th). My spirit has been heavy, numb, and quiet all day. I watched The Passion of the Christ last night, amazed that I sat and watched the severe flogging that my Christ endured - His skin ripped by shards of glass or metal pieces. Scripture tells us that by his stripes we are healed. In the movie He accepts the stripes upon His body with amazing strength and willingness. The anguish He experienced in Gethsemane could have been from His sovereign understanding of the immense pain that we would soon suffer - the stripes upon His Divine being in human flesh, enduring the fullness of it all. I simply cannot wrap my mind around this - It's too much sometimes. Oh the humility of the Divine Savior! He allowed His own creation to spit, mock, slap, beat, and ultimately kill Him. Oh the love of my Lord! My eyes are closed and my mind is slow.

Later that week...Mark 15:33-34 says, "At the sixth hour darkness came over the whole land until the ninth hour. And at the ninth hour Jesus cried out in a loud voice, "Eloi, Eloi lama sabachthani?" which means, "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?" In the Easter message it was mentioned that Jesus died two deaths - a spiritual death and a physical death. It was explained that while Jesus hung on the cross (as described in Mark 15:33-34 - "At the sixth hour darkness came over the whole land") from the sixth hour until the ninth hour, He bore the sin of mankind. The physical torture and the mental, emotional, and spiritual torment of the rejection of His creation, Christ endured. The sheer ugliness of sin, Christ accepted. Then at the ninth hour Jesus cried out in a loud voice, "My God, my God why have you forsaken me?" You see, the Father had to turn away from His blessed son - why? - Because Jesus was completely consumed by sin. And God, in His Holiness cannot be near sin - sin will always keep us from experiencing the fullness of God's presence. Jesus' physical death took place when He cried out again in a loud voice, "It is finished", and he gave up his spirit (Mark 27:50; Matthew 19:30). Ironically, I had always wondered what Jesus meant when he said, "My God, my God why have you forsaken me?" Jesus' body literally bore the open wounds of sin - for a visual of what sin looks like, think about the image of Jesus on the cross in The Passion of the Christ. Sin will always keep us from enjoying God's Holy presence. Sin rips through our flesh and it bruises our hearts. Unacknowledged sin infects the health of our souls and it poisons our minds. We too, must endure death - death of self. Self will always push itself to the top making it the priority of our lives. Selfish ambitions and a self-centered focus will always keep us from enjoying the fullness of God's presence - the warmth and the peace that radiates from His Holiness. Oh what a Savior we have! His stripes have clearly marked the pathway to the healing presence of our heavenly Father. Thank you Jesus for enduring the fullness of our sin and for healing - healing that has comes to us through the stripes that you so willingly accepted for all mankind. Praise your Holy name!

Jesus' Heart

Her eyes were closed, her head rested on the back of the swing, and her soft brown hair danced in the breeze around her precious face as she swung on the old wooden swing and sang a song that went something like this; "You give me your heart and I will give you mine. If you serve me I will serve you." then her eyes opened and she said, "Mommy, Jesus wants to give you his heart. Do you want his heart Mama?"

I had never thought about Jesus wanting to give me His heart. I had always thought about me surrendering my heart to Him. What does an exchange of hearts mean? What does it really look like? Olivia has sung that made up song before, but she had not spoken about Jesus wanting to give me His heart. Think about it - do you believe that is exactly what He wants to do? To exchange hearts? He has fully opened His Divine Self up to anyone who will believe in Him. What would it feel like, what would it be like, to exchange hearts with Jesus? What an amazing thought that the God of the universe wants to exchange hearts with you and me. Our relationship with Him is truly reciprocal (an exchange of gifts, love, service, devotion, etc.). How often do you think about how much Jesus wants for us to take His heart and live in His love - To bask it the warmth and security of such love? We are too consumed with the pursuit of perfection that we overlook the fact that Jesus craves our stillness before Him. That His heart's desire is for our striving to cease and peace be found in the acceptance of His gift of grace. The story of Jesus is a love story. My relationship with Jesus is it's own love story. He is the only one who fully gets me and still loves me. He knows how I process life and why I process it the way that I do. He knows about ever step that I have ever taken, every word that I have ever spoken, every hurt that I have ever experienced. Jesus ' love for me is unconditional. He waits patiently for me to come to Him. He understands how much of Him I am aware of and what I lack in knowing Him. He is a gentleman who courts my spirit with His love. He longs to provide my every need. He waits for my call. He is the suitor of my soul. Now... if I can only be that with Him.

Testing 1,2,3

After the week we have had, I am reminded of an experience that I had when we first arrived.

Our First Few Weeks

On Tuesday morning I woke up overwhelmed, I sat on the bed and cried. All I could do was whisper the name of Jesus. I began replaying my past experiences with these feelings and I realized that I was grieving over where I had just come from – the familiar and the predictable - I was at the edge of myself. To be at the edge of myself is exactly where God wants me to be. As I sat on the edge of my bed God’s presence surrounded me and His peace gently cleared away the fog of fear that had surrounded me. He reassured me that He had brought me to this place for His purpose and glory and that He will provide ALL that I will need – He told me that He is ever present, to find rest in Him alone.

The next day in my quiet time God spoke to me through the following:

“When you are told to seek first the Kingdom of God, the first step is to secure that your will is for that Kingdom - A single eye to God’s glory - Desiring nothing less than that His Kingdom come - Seeking in all things the advance of His Kingdom.” God Calling by AJ Russell

So much can distract us as we attempt to grow in faith. The quote above provides such clarity. When I realize that it is God's Kingdom that I seek, and that I am to have my focus on God's glory and purpose for the advancement of His kingdom, circumstances become more clear. My faith in God is tested when opposition is in my face and when I can't see what is coming or how things are going to turn out. All that I know is that I have been given a task. Wanting to comply, I must place the end result in God's hands, trusting that He is the one in control. And of course this is where the rubber meets the road and where my faith is tested. Oh how I want to pass this test! I will only pass the test if I choose to believe completely in God's grace, mercy and sovereignty. Help me Abba in my unbelief…

Prayer Request

Seeking FIRST God's Kingdom - Securing our first step, narrowing our focus for God's glory, desiring nothing less than His Kingdom come, and seeking in all things the advancement of His Kingdom in Romania. May God grant us like minds. May He heal hearts and cast out all fear. May His perfect and pleasing will be done in the lives of all Romanians.

The Narrow Door

"Strive to enter through the narrow door, for many, I tell you, will seek to enter and will not be able." Luke 13:24

Narrow = limited in scope and size; narrow down, to focus, to reduce, to limit, to get thinner.
Strive = to try hard, to fight in opposition, to compete resolutely to something, to go all-out.
Stuff = personal possessions, qualities, specialty, talents.

I sit, and I wonder about this narrow door. What does it look like? Is it ornate or simple? Is it hidden or easily found? Does it have to be unlocked with a key or can someone just turn the knob and open the door? Why is it so narrow? Why are we encouraged to strive to enter through the narrow door? What is on the other side? Why do so many find it but are unable to enter? What keeps them from entering?

Imagine yourself as an explorer off to find a lost treasure somewhere in the world. Your backpack is loaded with all of the latest gadgets. You are geared up with the latest high tech sportswear. As you set out in search of this rare treasure, you are ready to conquer anything that comes your way. A year later, you are closer to finding the treasure that you seek. The past year has been filled with amazing discoveries, some dangerous situations, and moments of doubt and uncertainty accompanied with a desire to turn back and head home - without the treasure. One day, you discover an ancient map that reveals the exact location of the treasure you so desperately seek. You forge ahead and finally find it. What lies before you now is the long awaited narrow door. As you begin to enter the passage way you realize that your backpack will not fit through the narrow opening. You decide that the treasure is worth leaving all of your "stuff" behind. You look back one last time, wondering if you will regret this decision. You wonder if you will be able to make it without your stuff, but your desire to discover the treasure pushes you onward towards what lies on the other side. Finally, you reach the opening. As you exit the passage way you find yourself in the presence of the Most High. You immediately fall to your knees in wonder. The light from His being is warm and bright. His Peace fills the air. You have entered into God's presence with nothing but the clothes on your back. All of your stuff has been left behind and you realize that being in His presence was all that you have ever needed.

Perhaps the narrow door represents what has to take place in our hearts, minds and souls before we can fully enter into His presence - fully receiving His power and Spirit. We must narrow down, focus, reduce, and limit our "stuff". Our talents, qualities, personal possessions keep us from total dependence on God. Our stuff can prevent us from entering the narrow door into the Kingdom of God. All that our Father wants for us to possess as we come to Him is faith like a child - faith in our Father who is perfect. Many people choose to put their faith, their security in their stuff. Of their own choosing many will not enter the narrow door. The road that leads to the shedding of self-sufficiency is where most turn back and return to the comforts of home. While, this choice might seem easier, in the long run it will imprison their hearts and seal their eternal fate. Only by God's Holy Spirit can we come to a place of understanding that as His children we must strive to enter the narrow opening - shedding off the excess weight/stuff that would ultimately lead to our undoing.

It all boils down to Faith (trusting in someone especially without logical proof - Encarta Dictionary) - Faith in God and the furthering of His Kingdom.

The Blessing

"I lay My loving Hands on you in blessing. Wait in love and longing to feel their tender pressure and, as you wait, courage and hope will flow into your being, irradiating (to make something brighter by shining light onto it) all your lives with the warm sun of My Presence." God Calling - by A.J. Russell - April 6

Blessing = the infusion (the act of installing a quality into a person) of something with holiness, with divine will (Wikipedia).

Bow your head and hear the voice of God; "I lay My loving Hands on you in blessing. Wait in love and longing to feel their tender pressure upon you. And as you wait, feel the warmth of My Son's presence saturate you with His hope and courage. Be still My child and experience the tender pressure of My loving hands and the invigorating warmth of my presence as I bless you, as I infuse My holiness and My divine will into your spirit."

Have you ever wanted to "feel" the tender pressure of God's presence? I was touched deeply when I read the introductory sentence, "I lay My loving Hands on you in blessing." I imagined a throne room and God as King, dressed in regal attire reaching out to lay His loving Hands upon my head and bless me as I knelt before Him, the King of Kings and Lord of Lords. This is an incredible image, but what created a desire to rise up within me was the next sentence; "Wait in love and longing to feel their (The fingers of God) tender pressure". Is it possible to physically feel the tender pressure of God's touch? Sit with that a minute. Is it possible to physically feel the tender pressure of God's fingers on you as He blesses you? A definition for blessing is; the infusion of God's holiness, and His divine will. Infusion is defined as the act of installing a quality into a person - the quality of holiness and divine will. Is the process of the blessing one that requires a longing for the feeling of the tender pressure of His hands? The processes of infusing or installing does require some time. This experience could be compared to the restoration of a building or the installing of a new computer program. Both examples require time. The laying on of God's hands begins the act of installing holiness into us and the waiting for God's blessing creates a longing to feel the tender pressure of His Fatherly touch. What is God calling us to? Is He revealing the secret to unleashing His blessing upon His children? As His children must we understand the significance of God's blessing and then must we seek after it - longing to feel the tender pressure upon our lives as we live to serve the One and only true God? Can we ask God to lay His loving Hands on others in blessing - wishing for them the same experience of a profound touch by God? I plan to continue this conversation with God - believing that He wants to reveal the secret of unleashing His blessing upon the lives of ALL of His children.

Abba help us to understand what you want to reveal. Amen.