Turn it up a notch

"I tell you the truth, if you have faith the size of a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you" (Matthew 17:20 NIV).

Faith and obedience will remove mountains, mountains of evil, mountains of difficulty. But they (FAITH AND OBEDIENCE) must go hand in hand. God Calling – March 28

What mountains loom before you? How intense is the storm raging around you? Do you feel helpless and alone? "Lift your eyes unto the hills for that is where your help comes from, your help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth." (casting crowns - Lifesong)

What an experience it would be to say to a mountain of evil, “Move it! You are blocking my path to Jesus!” and instantly that mountain would be removed and Jesus would be standing on the other side in all His glory – so bright, so pure, so perfect. Can you imagine that?

Why would Jesus begin his sentence with, “I tell you the truth,” if the remainder of His sentence wasn’t factual? Does He really mean what He said in Matthew 17:20? The next part of the sentence is the kicker…”if you have faith the size of a mustard seed,” there’s that word again…if. In order for the rest of the sentence to actually be experienced that small two letter word means everything. “If you have this you can do this.” If represents conditions – it is conditional in that something is required in order to receive the “impossible”. Oh…how I want to turn up my level of faith a notch. How about you? In Mark chapter 9 Jesus heals a demon possessed boy. The boy’s father says to Jesus, (v. 22) “if you can do anything, take pity on us and help us.” 23 “If you can?” said Jesus. “Everything is possible for him who believes.” 24 Immediately the boy’s father exclaimed, “I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!” Jesus repeats back to the boy’s father his own statement in third person in the form of a question “if you can?”. I can hear Jesus saying within that repeated question, “You really don’t know who I am, do you? I am the I AM. I am the maker of heaven and earth. I possess all power and grace. If I can? Son, I can do anything!! But first, I require that you believe.”

At this very moment in your life where are you in your level of faith/belief/trust in God? Obedience will naturally follow an intense faith in the One who is all things, at all times, for all people. I do believe that FAITH AND OBEDIENCE hand in hand truly can move any mountain that blocks your path to Jesus. I believe that FAITH AND OBEDIENCE to the Maker of heaven and earth will calm any storm. Lift your eyes unto the hills child of God, for your help comes from the One who created you.

Abba, turn up our faith a notch we pray in Jesus' name – Amen.

A rare moment - Mommy and her baby girl.

Below the surface

What lies deep down inside the recesses of our hearts, our minds, our souls? Oswald Chambers writes (referencing Psalm 139), "The psalmist implies - " But, my God my soul has horizons further away than those early mornings, deeper darkness than the nights of earth, higher peaks than any mountain peaks, greater depths than any sea in nature." I love the reference to the horizons of our souls, but it was the reference to the "greater depths than any sea in nature" that has drawn me in. The image of an abyss (a chasm or gorge so deep that its extent is not visible) entered my mind. There are depths in the sea that are not visible, and caverns in the earth that are so deep that they are not reachable. Our souls have deep, dark places - depths that are greater than any sea. As I continue to process this amazing truth, I find myself begging God to enter into the deep, dark depths of my soul. It is in the deep, dark abyss of our souls that our true nature is found. Over the course of our lives our experiences have shaped the way in which we process life - our experiences have influenced our concept of God and His character. Our relationships have created patterns that color the way we see life and how we interact with one other. Only God knows what lies in the darkness. Only by His light of truth and grace can we be healed and freed of the things of life that tie us up and blind us. I find amazing stillness in my spirit when I ask God to enter into the deep, dark places of my soul. I see His holy light of truth exposing things unseen - His holy light bringing new life - His holy light leading and guiding - His holy light healing the deep cuts of life that influence our daily lives. We will remain wounded children of the King if we don't allow Him to enter into our darkness. It is by His Holy light, light that contains all things good and pure, that we may live this life on earth in victory and in the joy that comes from total surrender to the One who is limitless - total dependence upon the One who can handle what He will find in the deep, dark places of our souls.

Abba, please enter the deep recesses of my soul with your light of truth and grace.

The Jesus Movie

Olivia has been wanting to see a movie about Jesus. Great! I love the idea, but the only movie that I have is The Passion - a little too heavy for my 4 year old (a little to heavy for me). One day on the way home from daycare Olivia kept asking me if she could see my "adult" movie about Jesus. And I said, "Livy it is an adult movie. You are too short to watch it." Finally I told her the real reason. "O.K. Livy do you want to know why I can't let you watch that movie?" She said, "Yes!" "Well, what happens in the movie is that Jesus dies. He is treated very badly by Roman soldiers." "Is there blood?" "Yes baby, a lot." "Well He just needs to go to the hospital." "Well unfortunately they didn't have hospitals when Jesus lived on earth." Well they should have given him a shot." "Good thinking…but they didn't have doctors to help give shots." "Does He die?" "Yes baby He does. But you know what happens after three days have passed?" "What Mama?" "Livy, He comes back to life! Isn't that amazing!" "Yes Mama!"

One day after that conversation, she told me that she wanted to put on some "college lipstick" (a.k.a. for grown-up lipstick) and watch my adult movie about Jesus - she is persistent. She always wants to see the picture of Jesus that is on the DVD. One day I said, "Isn't He beautiful!" and now every time she sees the DVD she says, "Isn't He beautiful!" I love hearing my daughter speak of Jesus this way. We talk a lot about our hearts. When someone is mean or does things that are bad we say, "His/her heart is sad." When Olivia obeys or says things that makes us feel her love for us we tell her, "Oh Livy that makes my heart feel so good - Oh my heart is so happy!" We talk about Jesus living in our hearts. Lately she has said out of the blue, "Mommy I love Jesus!" "Oh baby that is wonderful! He loves you too very much." "He lives in my heart. Do you love Him Mommy?" "Oh yes Livy I love Him very much." I live for these conversations. I love that I got to tell my baby about how much Jesus loves her and about His sacrifice for us all. Oh how I pray she will choose to follow Jesus all the days of her life - But not just follow Him, but love Him and know of His love for her. Oh may it be so in her most precious life. What a privilege it is to be her Mommy.

Caught in the act

I was washing dishes and Olivia came in to ask me for my help with something. I told her after I finished cleaning the kitchen I would come and help her. Without a word from me I caught her out of the corner of my eye putting things away - helping me finish cleaning the kitchen. As she was putting the orange juice carton away she asked me, "Is this o.k. Mommy?" I grinned a grin of sheer delight and said, "Livy that is perfect." Oh boy was my heart warmed when I had caught her in the act of service. Oh how I pray that this act will become a behavior that she will perfect as she grows up.

30 minutes

I walked into the little kitchen at Olivia's daycare and I heard the girls in the room next to the kitchen say with excitement "Tortul" (the cake). As I worked to put the cake, juice, and small treats on the table one of the little cuties came up to me and started speaking to me and all I could do was smile and shake my head back and forth with a look of confusion - I got nothing. I finally said, "La revedere" (goodbye) and headed out the door. On our way home I stopped at the small pastry shop that makes great pretzels and apple strudel. The pretzels are best when they have just come out of the wood burning oven. As I stepped up to the little window the smell of fresh baked pastries caressed my senses and teased my empty stomach. I was greeted by a nice young lady. I then said in Romanian, " Cinci covrigi şi un strudel cu mere va rog" (5 pretzels and an apple strudel please). She cut a small strand of twine from the spool and began threading the twine with my pretzels. She then said, "Cu sare?" (with salt) and I said, "da doi cu sare." (yes 2 with salt). She packed up my yummy apple strudel and handed it to me saying, " Cinci lei" (5 lei - Romanian currency). I handed her a 5 lei bill and then said, "Mulţumesc!" She smiled and said, "Cu plecere" (your welcome). I got in the van and said with great joy, "I did it! I spoke Romanian!" Scott smiled as I recited my experience. It is interesting to have had two distinctly different experiences all within the time frame of 30 minutes. From complete confusion to completing a simple transaction - Such is the life when you live in a completely new context.

Flying Solo

That's right I just completed my first solo mission in Bucharest. Scott went to see some property that the church owns outside of Bucharest. So today, I was on my own to get Olivia to her grădiniţa (daycare) and to go grocery shopping. With great success I made my way to Olivia's grădiniţa and dropped her off for a day full of fun (a birthday party and dance class all provided by her grădiniţa). And then onto the Bucharest Mall where I had a nice quiet morning planned - an early lunch at Starbucks, that's right we have a Starbucks Praise the Lord, and then I leisurely made my way to G Market, that's right the grocery store is IN the mall where I made a genuine effort to speak Romanian, not just point to things. When I finished grocery shopping (which was also my first time solo) I thought to myself, "independence here I come!!"

I remember going through this same experience in Costa Rica, then in Guatemala, and now yet again I work through my anxieties of a place that is unfamiliar to me. It is truly a strange thing to go from confidence to such vulnerability. I suppose the vulnerability is a great way God can, if we allow Him to, impact our lives with His deep desire to have us all to Himself. It is an opportunity to trust completely in His grace, power, mercy, love. Yesterday on our way home from school Olivia and I were talking about obedience. We have been working hard on obedience. Olivia will listen and then she will process what she has heard verbally. With her hands raised high and in a very matter-of-fact tone she said, "Just obedience Mom - just obedience!" Just as Scott and I have been diligently teaching Olivia about obedience and the consequences of disobedience, God has used my exasperation with the process to catch my attention. He too is a parent, He is our heavenly Father. And He too works diligently to teach His children about obedience and the consequences of disobedience. He whispered into my spirit, "Just obedience my child, just obedience." Life goes much smoother when we obey than when we rebel and fight God's attempts to lead us in paths of righteousness for His namesake. My experience today has refreshed me as I hear my Abba Father telling me, "As you have obeyed me by going to Romania, I will give you all that you need to fulfill my plans for your life. Cindy, life is much richer when you obey."

"Oh Abba help me to not resist your leading. Help me to surrender all things to You who are matchless - You who are limitless. Amen."